It's very early morning (U.S. Pacific time), and I'm already seeing more than one "#IPD14" tweet per minute, most of them with relevant links.
But we here at Dead Tree Edition headquarters have our own way of honoring special days (like wearing all-natural condoms to celebrate Earth Day). So here are our 10 suggestions for making this day really special:
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| Nice Frisbee you've got there. |
- Moon the next bank that sends you a "Go Green, Go Paperless" message.
- Hand someone’s tablet to her three-year-old child. (“No, Mr. iPad does not like to be dropped. Can you say “ouch”? Can you say “cracked screen”?)
- Calculate the percentage of emails received today that you don't read; be sure to check your spam folder. Now compare that to the percentage of mail pieces you receive today that you don't look at.
- Tell the IT department you want to include a scratch-and-sniff promotion in your next email blast. “C’mon, I saw something like this in a dead-tree magazine. If those geezers can do it, you can too, right?”
- Mail a handwritten note to someone you are trying to impress. And have the rescue squad on standby in case the recipient can’t take the shock of receiving personal mail.
- Visit your "Print is dead" friend, go into his pantry, and tear the labels off all the cans and packages. Just think, you'll be helping him realize his dream of going paperless. (While you're at it, maybe you should remove all the paper from his bathroom as well.)
- To the tune of “YMCA,” sing “C-M-Y-K,” and make up new, print-friendly lyrics. Don’t forget the arm motions. Take a selfie when you’re doing the “K” and post it to your Facebook page.
- Use your Kindle as a Frisbee.
- Watch the Viagra-in-a-printing-plant TV ad and think of the suggestive, print-related sweet nothings he’ll whisper to his wife when he gets home. (“Hey, baby, let me get rid of your PMS by converting it to process colors.”)
- Buy a book. Not an e-book, which can only be rented (regardless of what the sellers say). A real ink-on-paper book. And read it.
4 comments:
Too funny! Well done.
"It's OK to print this email. Paper is a biodegradable, renewable, sustainable product made from trees. Growing and harvesting trees provides jobs for millions of Americans. Working forests are good for the environment and provide clean air and water, wildlife habitat and carbon storage. Thanks to improved forest management, we have more trees in America today than we had 100 years ago."
Now, understand that we don't advocate wanton waste of paper or any other material, but avoiding the print option does absolutely nothing to save the planet or forests. More forests are dying of insect infestation and disease or being paved over across this country right now than could be converted to an email print-out in a thousand years.
Paper is good. Around 105 A.D., man discovered that paper traveled and transcribed better than stone; it became the renewable medium of choice. Frankly, the human eye can only stare at a computer screen for so long.
We appreciate and applaud people who are sensitive to environmental issues. We both love forests and are avid environmentalists. But we are going to continue to print out those necessary emails without guilt.
Honest, it's okay to print. Trees are renewable, recyclable and sustainable." Chuck Leavell, musician and tree farmer.
LOL... I was a bit occupied yesterday and didnt realize your tweets were part of a bigger post - I was just loving the celebration suggestions!! Meanwhile, for those playing along, the final #IPD14 stats are in... 6PM ET 10/7 - 8PM ET 10/8 generated 8,683 Tweets DELIVERED to 23,023,968 timelines with 1,271 contributors. #IPD15 is scheduled for October 14, 2015 so everyone has a loooong lead time to get on social and join us... after all if MR. TREE can tweet - so can you!!
Nice work, Deborah, in conceiving, promoting, and organizing the first IPD! I didn't even realize my tweets on Tuesday would become a blog post on Wed. I just kept coming up with bizarre ideas, tweeting them, and getting good response from the tweeps -- and pretty soon I had the makings of a full article. I'm hoping readers will recommend 10 more ways we can honor IPD15 on 10/14/15.
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